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A clean house is the sign of a broken computer.
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Internet Explorer - The number one browser for downloading a better browser
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They say so many people die because of alcohol, 
they never realize how many of them are born because of it.
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Nothing sucks more than that moment during an argument when you realize you're wrong.
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Was learning cursive really necessary?
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Bad decisions make good stories.
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"Do not machine wash or tumble dry" means I will never was this - ever.
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Can we all agree to ignore whatever comes after Blu-Ray? 
I don't want to have to restart my collection.. again.
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I hate leaving my house confident and looking good, 
and then not seeing anyone of importance the entire day. 
What a waste.
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Doesn't the freezer deserve a light as well?
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Sometimes, I'll watch a movie that I watched when I was younger,
and suddenly realize I had no idea what the heck was going on.
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How many times is it appropriate to say "What?" before you just nod and smile,
because you still didn't hear or understand a word they said?
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As a driver I hate pedestrians, and as a pedestrian I hate drivers, 
but no matter what the mode of transportation, I always hate bicyclists.
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That awkward feeling when you look down at your watch 3 consecutive times, 
and still do not know what time it is.
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